You noticed something. Here is what to do with it.
There is no smell and no bottle in the garage. That is why families take eighteen months to see this. Walk through it one step at a time.
Do, and don't
Say the plain sentence: “I think gambling has a hold on you and I want to help you get help.”
Protect the household money — separate accounts, credit freeze, your name off joint credit.
Go to Gam-Anon for yourself, whether or not they ever get help. You need your own room.
Don't pay the debt quietly. Cleared debt with nothing else changed is usually a bigger debt later.
Don't police, search, or count for them. It becomes your full-time job and it does not work.
Don't threaten a consequence you will not carry out. One empty threat costs a year of credibility.
Gam-Anon runs meetings for families, separate from the gambler's. Find a meeting and a counsellor in your state, or call 1-800-GAMBLER and ask for the family side.